An Anniversary of Sorts

More than a year has passed since I passed out while standing up.  This feat was done from too much drinking and the hitting of my head from the tree like fall worried me enough to get it checked out by a doctor. Right after that I made the decision to stop drinking. For the most part I’ve stayed true to this decision and as a result this has been a year of huge progress for me.

For the first couple of months I was bored and felt like my social life evaporated. From advice from some facebook friends, I learned that bad habits need to be replaced by good habits. Soon I returned to the gym, and I read quite a bit more. Also I really started to appreciate the monthly dinners I have with a few of my good library friends. Shifting the focus of my socializing to over dinners instead of tanking away at bars has helped a lot. Soon I noticed that I was spending less, and enjoying not being hung over. I would never say I was an alcoholic, but it was part enough of my life, that there was a big difference when I stopped. Around June I started skateboarding again. I decided I couldn’t sit on a year old ACL injury forever. That was the final piece, to make my life active again, and it gave me something positive to obsess about.

Now is a good time as any to mention that I take medication that one shouldn’t mix drinking with.  Nothing happened during my adulthood of drinking and taking this medication, and I was always careful not to go on benders or drink daily. But anytime you do something your not suppose to do, you feel guilty. At least I did when I got lectures from loved ones, and since I stopped drinking and smoking I don’t feel self guilt about much of anything. I still worry about nonsense, but I feel I’m being honest with myself, my family, my friends, and basically everyone.

July through fall was great. I skated regularly and quickly got used to not being a night owl.  At work I had more focus, got a promotion, and put a huge effort in doing the librarian thing right. In general I felt great about what I was doing, and the direction my life was heading.

In October I started the patch program to quit smoking and it worked. The patch is for ten weeks and I finished it soon after the New Year. Without drinking I think my chances of being a non-smoker has increased greatly. I’m into making goals and have quite a few for this spring and summer, but I should pat myself on the back for what I have done.

Lastly, recently for a bookclub at work I read Double Bind which I thought was an excellent book. Maybe I’ll blog a review of it separately, but I wanted to point out one thing. A character in that was a homeless man who after his death they found professional photography from the 50’s and 60’s. So a plotline in the book was that people can be talented at what they do and all it takes is the wrong life choices, stress, bad luck, or not taking medication to have everything in a life ruined.  I thought about this idea quite a bit and concluded that life decisions should be taken seriously.

2 thoughts on “An Anniversary of Sorts

  1. When you think about it, life decisions are all we really have. It is true that there are many things we can’t control, but that gives us all the more reason to be proactive about those things we can control- such as how we live our life. I find your behavior in the past year brave, intelligent, and very inspiring. Keep it up!

  2. Thanks so much Bethany. I have a great family that I can talk to.
    Take care,

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