Balding Makes Me More of a Player!

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Quite a few men in the true blue American way digress from their prime in three logical steps.  First they marry women they settle for. Then they get fat, and lastly they start balding. I’m glad to be progressive on this issue by being fat and starting to bald before I go into the ball and chain, or marriage. So here, as briefly as possible are my reasons to celebrate the fact that I’m going bald.

  1. Nothing quite states authority as much as a balding man.  Authority wise balding is second only to gray hair.
  2. My immature behavior and personality will be hidden better by my aging appearance.
  3. Instead of worrying if I’m turning into a creepy old dude, I’ll accept that I am in fact a creepy old dude.
  4. My success rate in dating will get better because I will seek the appropriate age range by knowing dating a twenty something babe is pure fantasy at this point.
  5. 30 something women will think I am appropriately older, and not immature.
  6. Skateboarding and looking old is simply awesome. The look of befuddlement on most people passing by a session makes aging very much something to look forward to.

That’s all folks! And I’m not going to shave my head or use hair supplements. My baldness will progress in a fashion visible to the world!

 

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